朋友圈沙雕文案

1、我今晚得早点睡，昨晚梦见的一个亿还没花完。

I have to go to bed early tonight. I still have a hundred million dollars in my dream last night.

2、发量少的朋友注意了！出门一定要戴帽子，因为二月春风似剪刀。

Pay attention to those who have less hair! You must wear a hat when you go out, because spring breeze in February is like scissors.

3、一个人如果胖到位了，看书都像在点菜。

If a person is fat enough, reading is like ordering food.

4、真羡慕你们有那么多口红，今天阿玛尼，明天兰蔻；像我这样的，只有出门时往对联上亲一口。

I really envy you have so much lipstick, today Armani, tomorrow Lancome; Like me, only to go out to kiss on the couplet.

5、我现在对钱都不感兴趣，不信你们给我发几个红包试试。

I am not interested in money now, I do not believe you can send me a few red packets try.

6、问一下各位美女，假如有两个男生追你，一个开法拉利，另一个没有车，但是北京上海各有一套三居室；你打算什么时候从梦里醒过来？

Ask each belle, if have two boys chase after you, one opens ferrari, another does not have a car, but Beijing Shanghai each has a 3 bedrooms; When are you going to wake up from your dream?

7、今天给大家介绍一下我减肥的方法：许愿。

Today I would like to introduce to you the method of losing weight: wishing.

8、谈恋爱这种事，一般男的被甩都是因为经济问题；女的被甩都是因为颜值问题；但如果我被甩，说实话，应该是对方脑子有问题。

Love this kind of thing, the average man is dumped because of financial problems; Women are dumped because of their appearance level; But if I get dumped, to be honest, the other person is out of their mind.

9、今年收入比较稳定，除去一切开销，还剩个锤子。

This year's income is relatively stable, except for all expenses, there is still a hammer left.

10、算命的说我20岁之后要多少钱有多少钱；现在我过了20岁了，身上只有16.8元，因为我只要到这么多。

Fortune tellers say how much money I need after 20 years old; now I'm over 20 years old, and I only have 16.8 yuan on me, because I only need so much money.

11、好怀念小时候，只要伸手就能要到钱；现在不行了，得跪在马路边上伸手才行。

Good miss childhood, as long as the hand can get money; Not now. I have to kneel on the edge of the road and stretch out my hand.

12、都知道失败是成功之母，那成功之父是谁呢？向我转账100元，你就是成功支付！

We all know that failure is the mother of success, but who is the father of success? Transfer 100 yuan to me, you pay successfully!

13、不要跟我讲道理，给我钱就行了，你说啥都对。

Don't reason with me. Just give me the money. Everything you say is right.

14、昨晚睡不着数羊，数到第68只，狼来了；看看羊群疯狂逃窜的样子，我想那肉肯定很劲道，于是我打开美团，点了三十串羊肉串。

Last night, I couldn't sleep and count the sheep. When I got to the 68th one, the wolf came. Looking at the crazy running of the sheep, I thought the meat must be very strong. So I opened meituan and ordered 30 kebabs of mutton.

樱砸（馆长）：本章完